Last night, I was wandering around alone in the streets of Amman. Accompanied by a pack of cigarettes and a wounded heart.

I was thinking how big this jail is, and how small I feel it. Thats what Amman is for me; a big jail. Everytime I pass by diner, I remember how beautiful was the restaurants in "Gre'aat" and how delecious was the food on the lovely shoulders of the Tigris river. Each time I walk by a tree, I remember how nice was our garden with the palm trees and the orange trees. And each time I get to my apartment, I remember how my room back in Baghdad was larger than the whole apartment I live in here. And when I pass by a cafe, I keep remembering the lovely night we had gathering in cafes in Abu Nu'as street with the huge group of freinds I had.

This was not way back in the past, it was one war ago.

Its just impossible to go on like this..!!

Maybe its best for me to go back home and die there. At least I won't keep remembering.

Earlier today I received a nice video from a friend by email. It about Baghdad. With the lovely song from Hussien Al-Jasmy "Bahebek Wahashteni" (it means I love you and I miss you).


All of this was just one war ago.